Growing into Me with Bipolar

Posts tagged ‘Guilt’

What I Received Today

” Dear Kat,

Please don’t be estranged from me any longer.  Your Aunt C is dying after almost a year of a long battle.  V is taking her from the hospital back to C’s home, and V will stay with her until she passes.  C is not expected to live more than 3 weeks.

And your Grandma was struck by a car while walking in a parking lot near her home.  She is in very bad shape, and will probably not walk again or be able to live in her own home again.

She and I have prayed for you daily all these years and I know it would mean a lot to her (and me) if she would hear from you.

She and I both love you deeply, and your kids too.

Please, please stop this.

I beg of you to call her.


So for those of you who have been following along, my Mom finally found me after 5 years.  When I cut her out of my life because  I finally decided I just couldn’t take the abuse any more.  And a month or so ago, she wrote me, and her letter was all soppy and sweet (ugh).  When I didn’t respond, this is the follow up letter I get (above).  So, when being all soppy sweet doesn’t work, she pulls out the guilt.  Now I never wished bad on anyone, and if it’s really true, I am sorry for them.  But that does not mean I can ever allow myself to be in any kind of relationship with her again—even if what she says is true (and I am not putting money on it).  But the real point is, if she can’t get what she wants by being saccharine, then she tries using guilt.  I expect the next letter to be angry, yelling, name-calling, to beat me into submission.  Hopefully, after that, she’ll try the ‘silent treatment’.

I started this post a while back, but wasn’t able to actually post at that time.  I can now, so here it is.

Tag Cloud

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